Cover: Had It All Until I Lost My BlackberryInside: Happy Birthday to somebody who has it all!
Cover: The Pug FactoryInside: Get Smashed On Your Birthday
Cover: WOW! A Special Birthday greeting from Stevie Wonder!Inside: Happy Birthday From Stevie Wonder (off-page)
Cover: When I Sends a Birthday Card, Sometimes It Be Early... Sometimes It Be On Time...Inside: 'Dis One Belated
Cover: I'm Sure You're Probably Who You Say You Are, But Regulations Require Me To Sniff Your ButtInside: I smell a Happy Birthday!
Cover: You're one in a million.Inside: But don't get too excited. Statistically, that means there are 6,700 people exactly like you.
Cover: "Honey, I'm home early. Have you seen fluffly?"Inside: Dust yourself off, it's your birthday.
Cover: As usual, Jesus wins this year's international surfing championship.Inside: You walk on water. Happy Birthday!
Cover: Saint Dude, Patron Saint of Lost Brain CellsInside: It's your Birthday? Sweet!
Cover: "Fuck'n mapquest."Inside: Hope you find your way to a happy birthday!
Cover: (Blank)Inside: Older… but wiser. Happy Birthday!